Trigger Warning
Thank you for calling
the Downtown Department Store’s
Customer Service.
“How can we help you?
Press one if you have questions
about your account.
“Press two if you wish
to purchase some merchandise—
thank you in advance.
“Press three if you wish
to return some merchandise—
good luck with that one!
“For everything else,
press four to be connected
with a live person.”
************************
“We apologize;
all our representatives
are busy right now.
“Thank you for calling;
we value your patronage.
please stay on the line.”
An hour elapses;
my thoughts are unprintable.
Then a voice intones:
“We apologize;
all our representatives
have left for the day.”